|
|
Jeffrey D Varner |
Rumored to be a Sith lord, but probably just a loser. Defender of truth, justice and the American way. |
| Graduate Research Assistants |
 |
Satyaprakash Nayak |
Computational and experimental analysis of proliferation and differentiation programs. Manages his repressed fury by diet and exercise. |
 |
Ryan Tasseff |
HL-60 super master blaster. Dork (knows what a Sith lord is). If he could drive in 1970s, he would have had a van with a wizard painted on it. |
 |
Tom Mansell |
Protein folding and glycosylation. Rumored to be a protein ninja. No solid proof. No longer has quality hair. Twitter addict. |
 |
Anirikh Chakrabarti |
Modeling cellular stress. Master of all stress in the Universe. "El Jefe" of the Cornell India Association. |
 |
Joe Wayman |
Modeling of prostate cancer and HL-60. Physicist. Big Joe is capable of incredible feats of strength. I saw him lift a VW microbus off a hippy (Ryan). |
 |
Brad Gates |
Hip-hop legend from the gritty streets of East Baltimore. Hater of HL-60 |
| Undergraduate Research Assistants |
 |
Joycelyn Chan |
Critical but scary member of the breast cancer team. Seems calm, but is liable to snap and throw a shoe at Ryan. Rumored to have had a 6-week dentist appointment. |
 |
 |
|